Ah, relationships. An ever changing and developing sector of our lives. Relationships often require daily attention and affect all the other sectors of our lives, which is why it is the sector we will concentrate on for this process.
Step One: Make a list and check it twice.
No, I’m not asking you to channel your best Santa Claus impression here. In order to know how you’d like to proceed in the next 10 years, you need to know all of the people that are currently in your life. By making this list, you will be able to see who needs more attention, who should be removed from your life, and the kind of people you need more of in your life.
Don’t forget to include the moms of your children’s friends, coworkers, Facebook friends, blogging friends, neighbors, teachers and leaders in your child’s life, your spouse’s coworkers, the barista that makes your coffee every morning, or your fitness class instructor/trainer. This may seem silly to you now. There is a reason to include them so bare with me.
Step Two: Categorize the list.
Go through the list using the following key and categorize everyone. This seems odd categorizing people but you are doing it to help you evaluate the relationships you want to develop or initiate over the next 10 years.
- F – Foundation
- These are the people in your life that are a part of your daily foundation. Your immediate family, such as your spouse and children, or your close friends. Include people in this category that you would go to the ends of the earth for. When you are making your 10 year plan, you will make goals specifically for your relationships with these individuals.
- D – Develop
- Include individuals in this category that are currently a part of your life but don’t play a major role and could potentially still be around 10 years from now. Think neighbors, parents of your children’s friends, blogging friends, or business acquaintances.
- X – Say Goodbye
- You guessed it. These are the individuals in your life that you wouldn’t be hurt if they weren’t in your life years from now or even tomorrow. There may not be anyone in your life that falls into this category but this is your moment to assess your status with anyone that is questionable. Maybe a friend that only comes around when they need something or a former boyfriend that still texts you. Once you decide to say goodbye to toxic people in your life, you’ll open yourself up to people who will uplift you.
- M – Maintain
- Code individuals with “M” if you like how things are today and want them to stay the same in the future.
Step Three: Fill the gaps.
Take a good look at your list. Who is missing? Would you like more business associates in your network of friends? Maybe you want a partner to share the rest of your life with and there currently isn’t anyone around that fits the bill. Identify your gaps and create a brief description of the traits these individuals would possess.
Step Four: Build your foundation.
Now is the time to create vision for the kind of relationship you want with the individuals you coded as “Foundation.” This step took me quite awhile. Everyone in this category mean the world to me, so I didn’t want to rush through it. Try to come up with two goals for each person.
Step Five: Develop relationships.
As you are reviewing the list of people you coded “Develop,” pay attention to the reason why you want to develop a stronger relationship with these people. Is there a theme? Perhaps, you wish to make more business connections or become more involved in your community. Take note of this for your 10 year plan.
You may be tired at this point. Making a 10 year plan is work but remember you are doing this for your future. Relax, or if you’re like me, your brain will continue to think about this and you may come up with more goals. Write those down, you don’t want to lose them.
If you are just joining the challenge, don’t miss out on some FREE worksheets! I have eight worksheets that will help you through the first eight days of the challenge.